Campaign Diary‎ > ‎

2. Intermission: Rise To Riches

After slaughtering every citizen of the small village at the foot of Mont-Azul, the party had looted, plundered and pillaged the entire township till nothing but the barest of bones remained.  Nothing was sacred, the pockets of mutilated children were stripped of every farthing. The town's cemetery was excavated and removed of every trinket that laid with the dead of the past millennium.  The wealth of the small town was startling, the community's little wedding scheme had obviously been lucrative.  The party left Mont-Azul soulless, but richer than kings.

Travelers who had happened to pass through the town during the month long plunderous project and witnessed the destruction had run from the village in fear and with new tales to tell.  Word of the group's exploits had spread far and wide throughout the Kingdom.  The party become known amongst citizens of the realm as "The Regulators".

The Regulators and their convoy of riches returned to their native hamlet of Bang Bang.  However, it was not more than two days before they soon found they had outgrown their home.  They were richer than all the Gods combined, and there was only so much you could purchase in Bang Bang.  The Regulators raised their eyes to the horizon, there in the distance, on the other side of the bay, was the city, the big smoke, the ancient metropolis of Cen Tea Ven.

However, before setting off in this new chapter in their lives, there were many drinks to bed shared at the local tavern and grand plans for the future to be hatched.  The group was no longer to be a rag tag regular adventuring party, no, it was to become a corporation.  A corporation of the most infamous mercenaries to ever walk these lands.  The culturally dubbed moniker "The Regulators" was now declared no longer a nickname, but a trademark.  A small office was purchased on the main street of Bang Bang and a stunning, curvaceous young receptionist named Penny Pound was hired to man it.

Next, a large vault was bored deep within the tallest mountain of Bang Bang to house the offensively large fortune stripped from Mont-Azul.  Finally, successful negotiations with a local band of pirates led to the purchase of one of the largest, most extensively armed spanish galleons to ever sale the seas along with a crew of over two hundred.  It was proudly renamed "The Black Canary".

Within just a month of the disastrous wedding of Haroldo, some impressive foundations had been built and barely a dent had been made to the groups grand expanse of treasures.

It was not just the business that was effected by the grand fortune of Mont-Azul.  While the corporation was being built, the month back on Bang Bang was also a significant period of development in The Regulators' domestic lives.

Although their relationship was on death's door, Haroldo and Brinnia purchased a grand house above the main harbour of Bang Bang.  It was so big they could go days without having to walk by each other in the corridors.

Crabs hired some of the best doctors of the land to try and curtail the effects of his extensive collection of STDs.  The most recent prognosis stated that it could be a number of years before he regained full health.

Mesculine joined a band named "The Dirty Uncles" who for one weekend were the hottest group to ever rock the three largest pubs on the island before they broke up after a fight over who should be in the centre of their portrait commissioned for their one and only promotional poster in the town square.

Lamb tried his best to put his recent fugue state behind him and began to make amends to the group by throwing himself into the development of the corporation.  Stepping onto the Black Canary for the first time to supervise the sea trials after its extensive restoration and refit, he became inspired by the discipline of the crew.  He set his sights on learning everything there is to know about sailing such an enormous water craft and joined the deck crew with the ambition of one day working his way up to being captain of the ship.

Lady Antoinette got heavily intoxicated one night at one of The Dirty Uncles gigs and awoke the next day to find a ring on her finger and a marriage certificate.  For a moment she was overwhelmed with shock and began searching her hotel room for the mysterious man named as her husband on the certificate, only to find a corresponding certificate of annulment to that same man in a pool of vomit on the floor of the bathroom.  Antoinette felt abandoned and it resurfaced some of her deep seated father/daughter issues.  In an attempt to repress them she formed and trained an extensive paramilitary force tasked with guarding the mountain vault.

With the company formed and the Black Canary seaworthy, The Regulators set sail from the shores of their home on Bang Bang, headed to Cen Tea Ven, the only place big enough that could suitably house their egos

It was not a shock to find that they were expected in port, since they themselves had sent messengers ahead to announce their arrival, however, it was a surprise find themselves waited upon by a crowd of thousands.  While on their return to Bang Bang they had been feared more than cheered, rumors of their exploits in Mont Azul one month later had mutated to such an extent that they arrived at the City as rock stars.

As they walked off the ship and down into the thousands of cheering fans they were overwhelmed.  Every woman lifted their skirt offering them the chance to fertilize her womb, every hotelier was offering free accommodation in return for their patronage, every businessman emptying their purses in the hope that The Regulators would promote their products.

Crabs and Mescaline were quick on their feet and started to run auctions for the group's attention.  They organised a number of brothels to service the crew of the Canary and purchased a big old harbor-side hotel to feed and intoxicate them.  With the crew sorted, The Regulators accepted the accommodation of a tall stout man in a top hat who introduced himself as Count Memphis.  On each arm the Count had two of the most exotically beautiful women the group had every seen.  He claimed he was the proprietor of the La Bona Coasta, the most prestigious bordello in the entire city.  In return for the publicity of having The Regulators stay at the La Bona Coasta, they could eat, drink and snort whatever they want and have complete access to the Coasta's finest courtesans, except for Crabs, who would have his own personal whore assigned to him so as not to spread STDs to the others.

So it was settled, The Regulators set up digs at the Bona Coasta and awaited their next adventure.  Of course, The Coasta brought an endless supply of courtesans and opiates which of course led to and endless cycle of excess.  It was a month into this bender before any of the men realized that they had not seen daylight since they arrived in the city and it wasn't until the bell boy raised his concern that the men realized that Lady Antoinette had been missing for more than a fortnight.